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Twelve Days Of Christmas Rewrite (And My Spam Email Awarded Me…)

December 3, 2010 · 64 comments

in Life

Once again, Sandy at First Gen American set forth a challenge to write a themed post.  The theme this time is “Christmas Songs”.  I chose to rewrite the 12 Days of Christmas to instead detail the great offers and such I receive in my spam email, instead of what my ‘true love gave to me’.  This little song is meant strictly in jest and there is no intent to offend.   It is actually based on what I have received in my spam email, although the numbers may not be accurate…So, have some hot tea, clear your throat, and get ready to sing!

The Twelve Days of Christmas, rewritten by song Lyricist Kris:

On the First Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   A Proposal from Hong Kong

On the Second Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:  Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Third Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Fourth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Fifth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:    Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Sixth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:    Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Seventh Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Eighth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Eight Opportunities To Change My Life,
Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Ninth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Nine Offers for Cheap Pharmaceuticals,
Eight Opportunities To Change My Life,
Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Tenth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:   Ten Requests for Assistance,
Nine Offers for Cheap Pharmaceuticals,
Eight Opportunities To Change My Life,
Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

On the Eleventh Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:    Eleven Cheque and Winnings Certificates,
Ten Requests for Assistance,
Nine Offers for Cheap Pharmaceuticals,
Eight Opportunities To Change My Life,
Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

(Sing slowly here….)
On the Twelfth Day of Christmas, my spam email gave to me:    Twelve Offers For Cialis,
(ok, sing super fast now…)
Eleven Cheque and Winnings Certificates,
Ten Requests for Assistance,
Nine Offers for Cheap Pharmaceuticals,
Eight Opportunities To Change My Life,
Seven Super Enalotto Prizes,
Six Greetings From Friends I don’t know,
Five 2010 Awards,
Four Blogging Secrets,
Three ‘Good Discounts’,
Two Legal Notices,
and A Proposal from Hong Kong.

Here are some other Christmas Song posts for you to enjoy:

If you enjoyed this post, please leave a comment or subscribe to the RSS feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader. Thanks for visiting!!!

{ 57 comments… read them below or add one }

First Gen American December 3, 2010 at 6:35 am

Man are you funny sometimes.

I put you in my list of links as well. I think my top spammers are definitely the requests for assistance and also the congratulations, I won or inherited $40MM dollars.

Reply

Kris December 4, 2010 at 10:44 pm

Thanks for the kindness and the links!!

Don’t spend that inheritance all in one place…

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101 Centavos December 3, 2010 at 7:36 am

The Nigerians must taking a break for the holidays. You a funny gal.

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Kris December 4, 2010 at 10:44 pm

I have not heard from the Nigerians in awhile. I do know that a lot of people that I don’t know have bequeathed a lot of money to me…

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Money Reasons December 3, 2010 at 7:57 am

That is hilarious!

Great job, this post made my day

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The Biz of Life December 3, 2010 at 8:29 am

Very clever.

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Crystal @ BFS December 3, 2010 at 10:59 am

Your spam and my spam look a lot alike! Great song!

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Kris December 4, 2010 at 10:40 pm

I am sure we are on the same spammy mailing lists!

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Lola December 3, 2010 at 3:38 pm

Looks like you didn’t get any insurance-deal gifts this year (unless they were in the offers to change your life?). Perhaps next year!

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Kris December 4, 2010 at 10:39 pm

Lola- I usually don’t get insurance offers. What am I doing wrong? I did get many others though that I did not mention.

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Aloysa December 3, 2010 at 8:58 pm

I loved the song! It is my new favorite Christmas song. I was LOL! You are really funny!

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Kris December 4, 2010 at 10:39 pm

Aloysa- thank you so much for your kind words. Your post was much more meaningful than mine!!!

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Sustainable PF December 4, 2010 at 10:44 pm

Brilliant! I’m sure you are trying to keep this PG rated, but the number of male enhancement spam I get is insane. That and the person who tells me I can get $17 million to help a foreign dignitary who needs my help to save his country by simply providing my banking information!

I love to make up new words to songs. Mrs. SPF gets a kick out of it when I make them up on the fly while listening to whatever song is on the radio.

Great post!

Reply

Kevin@InvestItWisely December 5, 2010 at 7:35 pm

Nice! I’ve been getting a lot more spam lately these days, too, I don’t know why. I think the worst are the spam comments that fail the conditional captcha: pages upon pages of viagra, cialis, etc… :S

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Khaleef @ KNS Financial December 5, 2010 at 9:59 pm

Hey Kris, I think we get the same spam. This was very funny!

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Bob December 6, 2010 at 10:23 am

That’s a pretty funny post. I actually don’t care if I get spam as long as it goes into the spam folder where it belongs without me having to look at it. Gmail is actually pretty good for that – I remember the days of having to abandon hotmail accounts…

Reply

Alison December 6, 2010 at 11:08 am

I love this! very funny… and something EVERYONE can relate to…

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