Life is full of change.

Change Can Be On A Grand Scale

This happened to me when I planned on being a hugely successful career-woman, but ended up turning to mush when my oldest child was born.  Once I held my son for the first time, work didn’t matter anymore.  I just wanted to spend time with him, and not with a computer.  It took some time, but we eventually saved enough money so that we could live off of just one income and I could stay home with the kids.  When I was a student, I would have never predicted that I would eventually become a stay-at-home mom, but that is exactly what I was for many years.  (I now just work part time from home.)  I now just look back at my ‘evolution’ and just laugh.    I am grateful I am a parent for many reasons, but one thing that is interesting is that I got to see a side of me that I didn’t even know existed.

Change Can Also Be On A Small Scale

An example of this is my current mindset with saving and spending.

Life has been crazy this year for a variety of reasons.  Things I used to worry about like saving the absolute most I could at the grocery store have slid way to the bottom of my list of concerns.  Instead, I just want my family to eat.  We have eaten out way too much this year, but it was almost a matter of necessity.  Things have settled down, but my need to scrimp and save as much as I can at the store has decreased dramatically.  Instead, I am more focused on buying the foods I want my family to eat, even if the items are not on sale.  Yes, putting full-price things in the grocery cart still makes me cringe somewhat, but my attitude toward money has relaxed a little.

Overall, I am still a very frugal person at heart, and I can almost guarantee that I will rarely spend full price on clothes or most other items, unless I am completely desperate.  (Like I probably will be when I need to find a dress for my son’s graduation.)   Even though I am spending a little more at the grocery store, buying full priced food at the grocery is still probably cheaper and healthier than if our family of five ate out.  (That is the justification I use when shopping now.)

The Overall Lesson

Sometimes, you just gotta go with the flow.    If you can no longer keep up with what you were doing previously, don’t beat yourself up about it.  Life is busy and isn’t always easy, and sometimes, you just have to do what you can to get by.  Don’t make things harder by being frustrated or disappointed in yourself.  Do the best you can and move on!

Just about six weeks ago, I had surgery to reconstruct my Anterior Cruciate Ligament.  (ACL)

Having this surgery was a big decision.  For one thing, I really wasn’t debilitated by my injury.  I could still walk (straight ahead), I wasn’t in pain, I had full range of motion.  However, pivoting even slightly caused my leg to give out.

I could have possibly gone on the rest of my life without have this ligament replaced.  However, my life would be altered.  Sports would be gone.  I would also have to think about any lateral move I made.  If I did the wrong thing, I was at risk of tearing my cartilage or tearing other ligaments.  So although surgery was not REQUIRED, it was recommended if I wanted to go back to doing many activities.

Just after surgery, my knee was huge, I had to put a full leg brace on my leg even for getting up off the couch, and I went to therapy three times a week.  There was a lot of pain, but there was also a lot of progress.  Each day got a little better, and at this point, my knee is more of a nuisance than a ‘focus’.

My recovery process reminded me that so many negative things in life are really just temporary.   When my pain medications wore off the day after surgery and I was miserable, I felt like I would never walk normal again and I questioned by decision to have the surgery. In less than four weeks though, the brace was gone and my normal gait was back.   (Not that the knee was fully recovered at that point, it still was very stiff and I still had another couple months of physical therapy to go.  However, day-to-day activities were manageable.) Sure those four weeks were not fun, but it was totally worth going through the pain and physical therapy to regain the ability to run around and live life again.

The Lesson:   Difficult Circumstances (Usually) Don’t Last Forever!

Sometimes you might just have to bite the bullet for a little while to get through certain circumstances, and then life will return to normal.  (Even though it might not seem so short-term at the time.)  This thought doesn’t apply just to health, but to almost anything.

For example, imagine you need to come up with an extra two thousand dollars to pay down a bill.  Maybe all it would take is working a second job for a month or two so that you can earn the needed money.  Sure, it might not be fun, but again, it is something you would only have to endure for a short period of time.   Next thing you know, the time has passed and your debts are settled.

Or, maybe you are considering starting a side business, but you keep putting it off because you ‘don’t have the time’. Well, think about how you really spend your time.  Do you spend a few evenings a week watching TV?  Would it be possible for you to give up some leisure activities for just a few months so you could devote your time and energy to your new venture?  Sure, those few months might be tiring, but the payoff could be huge.

So, next time you think of something you would like to accomplish in the future, really think about what is stopping you from doing it right now.  Do you really have a reasonable roadblock?  Or, could you push through for a few months to attain what you want?

Jeremy Lin is an unexpected success story out of the NBA.

In a nutshell, he was a star basketball player in high school.  Although he was talented, colleges were not pounding down his door and handing him scholarships.  Some colleges said he could try and walk on, and Harvard and Brown both said he could play for them.  In the end, Lin chose to attend and play for Harvard.

His college career was impressive.  He was selected All Ivy-League First Team, and Harvard had some great seasons while Lin played. However, the NBA was not begging Lin to come play.  As a matter of fact, Lin was not even drafted in 2010. That didn’t deter Lin though.  He went to the Dallas Mavericks mini camp and also played in their summer league.  This got Lin noticed and next thing you know, Lin is getting offers from the Mavericks, Lakers, and Golden State Warriors.  In the end, Lin signed with the Warriors, which was his favorite team growing up.

Lin did not stay long with Golden State, and he eventually ended up getting picked up on waivers by the New York Knicks in December of 2011.   Lin was not guaranteed a very illustrious role – he was going to be third string point guard, although he was quickly assigned to the D League.  However, the move worked out pretty well because Lin had a triple double in one of the D League games and ended up being recalled by the Knicks pretty quickly.

However, Lin still didn’t start and his roster spot was shaky at best.  But, the Knicks started playing pretty poorly and coach Mike D’Antoni decided to let Lin have some play time.  What happens next is an athletes dream come true:

On February 4th, Lin scored 25 points against the New Jersey Nets.  He started the next game against the Utah Jazz and scored 28 points.  On February 10th, Lin scored 38 points against the Lakers.    Next thing you know, Lin is named the Eastern Conference Player of the Week.  That is an accomplishment you don’t see very often from a Harvard graduate!

Please Don’t Ever Change Lin!!

Whereas just about everyone loves a Cinderella story, what makes this story so wonderful to me is Lin himself.  He is getting his 15 minutes of fame right now, and you don’t see him running around getting tattoos and hanging out in bars. Instead he is crashing on teammates couches and crediting God for his success.  His priority is his friends and family, and not fame and fortune.

How refreshing!

Of course, we are just at the beginning of Jeremy Lin’s story and time will tell what happens with his career and how he handles his new ‘status’.  I just hope that he manages to stick to his values and doesn’t end up in the ‘fast lane’. It would be great if in five years we read about how superstar Jeremy Lin owns a cute house in the suburbs and lives a happy little life.

Dreams Can Come True!

Jeremy Lin’s story is a unique one, and quite extraordinary.  However, it is just more proof that just about anything is possible.  If Lin can go from Harvard to the NBA, think of all the smaller-scale things that are possible!

One of the things that holds many people back from chasing their own dreams is the fear of failure, or the thought that the dream or goal is just unattainable.  Well, a lot of people meet their goals each and every day.  Some goals are easier than others, but I really believe you can do just about anything if you have a strong work ethic, some intelligence, and the drive to succeed.

Keep in mind though, dreams do not come true overnight.  You can’t expect to suddenly become a professional photographer if you don’t own proper equipment and have enough training.  If you prepare yourself both emotionally, mentally, and financially, nothing should be able to stop you.  Just make your plan, and go after it!

Does something stop you from chasing your dreams?  Or, do you have a plan in place so you can live your dream?

I recently had Anterior Cruciate Ligament (ACL) reconstruction in my left knee.  Recovery from this surgery usually requires a full ankle to thigh brace, and the patient has to be very careful to not pivot or twist while the new ligament is healing.

Because I was terrified of falling or twisting in the shower, I put a chair in the shower to ensure I would not fall for a few weeks after surgery.  Once I felt confident of weight bearing on my left leg without the brace, I got rid of the chair.  I saw this as a victory, and was sharing my accomplishment with my family.  Right after I stated my success, my oldest son said “but why WOULDN’T you want to sit down in the shower?”.  Well, I guess I never really thought about that.  Sitting actually was quite comfortable, but I didn’t like that I HAD to sit to take a shower.

This little shower discussion made me think about the power of choice.

Most of the time, choice is good!

Having multiple options in most situations can be very helpful.  For myself, I can’t stand being backed into a corner with little or no choices.  However, some people prefer to NOT have a choice so that a decision can be made for them. Not having options eliminates second guessing or worrying over any particular decision.

However, I think having options is key to feeling freedom and maybe even having an optimistic outlook.

Think about your own future.

Wouldn’t you rather have the ability to travel to visit family, maybe spend the winter months in a warm climate, and have choices regarding medical care in your retirement years?  If you do want to have such options, it requires a lot of work and a lot of money.  You can’t go through your life spending as you wish and magically expect to have the ability to do whatever you want in the future.  (Unless you are born with more money than you can spend.)  You must be disciplined in order to attain that freedom.  It takes sacrifice, planning, and some good luck and health too.

So, if you live your life without goals, rethink that strategy.  It is never too late to start saving and planning for tomorrow.  It may be easier to live day-to-day for now, but it will make your life much harder in the long run.

If you do have a plan for the future, when did you create it?  Have you stuck to your plan, or does it evolve?

A few weeks ago, we had issues with our sink and we had to hire a plumber.  The plumber was in the kitchen chatting with me when I glanced over at the wall and saw one of my pictures on the wall was crooked.  Being the polite person I am, I kept looking forward to chat with the plumber while oddly leaning against the couch to adjust the picture.  As I leaned over the couch with my feet planted, I heard several popping sounds.  The pain was excruciating, but since the plumber was there, I couldn’t yell expletives and cry like I wanted to.  I just calmly sat down and thought I might implode.  After the plumber left, I tested my leg and was able to walk around.  However, my leg was giving out on me, and I knew I was in trouble.  (I blew out my right knee playing soccer years ago and had 3 surgeries on that knee.)  I got an MRI the next day, and of course, my ACL was completely torn.

I discussed my options with a sports medicine doctor and an orthopedist, both who suggested surgery if I planned on doing any more than walking completely straight the rest of my life.  (And hope I never slip on ice or trip on a pine cone.)  Given how much the leg was getting on my nerves, and the fact I don’t want this knee to limit my activities the rest of my life, I decided to have ACL reconstruction done.  The surgery is actually today (January 12th, 2012).

I must say this is probably the dumbest injury I have ever had.  The doctor theorizes that my ACL was partially torn previously, and this little twist just tore it the rest of the way.  Whatever, I just know that I am incredibly mad at myself.  I am mad at the plumber too, but not sure why.

So, I will be taking a little break.  If you find you miss me, please feel free to dig through my old posts (with your Alexa bar on, of course) and poke around.  I may be bored out of my mind during recovery and end up online constantly, who knows.  Maybe if I get some good painkillers I will end up writing the post of my life, so make sure you don’t stray too far!

See you soon!

Christmas break in 2011 started on December 16th.  My daughter had a basketball game that night, and the following morning, we hopped on a plane and headed to Florida.  The weather was beautiful, the trip was great, and we returned on December 23rd.  After we returned, I ran around like crazy trying to get everything finalized for Christmas.  The holiday came and went, and the following week, I did…

Nothing.

I have never been less productive in my life.  I didn’t write (much), I barely cooked, I really don’t know what I did.  I guess I drove the kids to some practices, but I really have nothing to show for all the time I had off.

My lack of accomplishment is comparable to people that charge up their credit cards and then really have no idea what they spent all their money on when it comes time to pay the bill.

This ‘lazy December’ has made me realize I have to make better use of my time.  I know I was tired from the traveling and hosting Christmas, but geez, I don’t think I really needed a week-long reprieve.

One thing my break did do was re-motivate me to make better use of my time.  Quite honestly, I slept way too much during this break, and I never used to be someone that slept in.  However, when you hear the wind blowing outside and you know it is cold out, it is so easy to just stay under the blankets and sleep.

But then the comfort of warm sleep is countered by guilt.  However, while lazing about, I did a lot of thinking.

What I Learned From Being Lazy

1. Sleep is addicting.  The more I slept, the more I wanted to sleep.  I could sleep 10 hours at night and still crave naps during the day.  What a waste.
2. I can only relax so much.  If you told me that I would have nowhere to be and there was nothing I ‘had’ to do, I would have celebrated that thought in the past.  After having such an ‘unscheduled’ week, I realized I must have a project to focus on or something, or I will just flounder.  (In my defense, I do have an injured knee so I am somewhat limited in my activities, but that is a post for another day.)
3. We better have a lot of money saved before we retire.  That thought was already a given.  However, while laying around thinking, I totally understood how some people feel lost when they retire.  If this past week was how I lived my life every day, I would probably go insane pretty darn quickly.   Part of the issue is feeling trapped inside the house because it is cold and blustery outside, which is why I want to have the ability to travel if I hate the weather I live in.
4. I don’t handle change well.  OK, I have always known that about myself, but my belief was even more affirmed during my lazy week.  My life went from chaotic to traveling to completely unscheduled, and I have to say I missed my ‘normal’ life.  Heaven help me when the kids all go off to college…

I was recently in Florida, and it was the first time I have ever spent part of the Christmas season in a warm climate.

I have to say, it was strange.

The first time I saw a Christmas tree in Florida and heard Christmas music, it just seemed `off` to me. Now, I recognize that a huge part of the world has never experienced a white Christmas, so a sunny, 80 degree day in December is just status quo. However, for this northerner who is used to a gray sky and sub freezing temperatures, it was a wonderful treat. I just had trouble associating the climate with the holiday, but I think I could definitely get used to it.

I wonder though, if I did move south, would I appreciate the nice weather, or would it just be a part of ordinary life? I ask this question about many things: Do the trials and tribulations we face in life force us to appreciate the good things?

It reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode I saw once.

In the episode titled “A Nice Place to Visit”, a small time criminal is shot during a robbery, and is escorted to the afterlife by “Mr. Pip”. In the afterlife, the criminal is granted his every wish, and he must live with the results of his wishes for all eternity. Sounds pretty good, right?

At the end of the episode, the petty criminal says something to the effect of: “Wow, if this is heaven, I wonder what the other place is like?”. YMr. Pip then says “this is the other place…”

Although the scene described above is a work of fiction, it makes you realize that variety very well may be the spice of life. Perhaps wondering what the future holds and having some amount of influence on your destiny is part of what makes life so great, even more so than being given everything you could possibly want?

Of course, I am not saying that catastrophic events are a great thing. However, sometimes it can be hard to see how great your circumstances really are if there are never any bad times to compare the good with. Just like in the example I discussed above, if I was always surrounded with sunny, warm days, would perfect weather just become expected and not appreciated?

What do you think? Do you embrace the great things in your life more so after a time of difficulty? Have you found there are things in your life that you once felt so grateful for, and now you take them almost for granted?

It seems every year, I create some goals for myself that are very serious, and pretty hard to accomplish. Of course, I have the best of intentions, but I must admit that quite often, some of my goals fall by the way side mid-year for various reasons.

So this year, just for fun, I decided to come up with some goals that are not only attainable, but will improve my life in some small, and possibly meaningless, way:

1. Never will a sock with a hole in it cross my heel again. You might think “you need a goal for this?”. Well, yes I do. Quite often I will hold on to a pair of socks beyond what is reasonable. Well, no more. If a sock is wearing out, it will go straight to the garbage and not the laundry basket. I figure I am a reasonable adult, and I don’t have to wear worn out socks anymore!

2. I will read more. I spend much of my time running around and trying to be productive. I don’t take nearly enough time for myself and that is going to change in the new year. I am not saying I will be kicking back and reading Harlequin romances while my family is starving or needs to go somewhere. But, if it is a sunny day, I am going to head out to the patio and enjoy some lemonade and a book for a little while. I am going to wholly enjoy it and not feel an ounce of guilt.

3. I will not allow mail to stack up. I am usually pretty good about sorting through the mail each day. Lately though, my counter has been piling up with useless mail and it just makes me mad. In 2012, I will not relax until all mail hash been recycled, thrown out, or filed. This topic leads me to…

4. I will eliminate as much ‘real’ mail as I can. I am going to call 1-888-5-OPT-OUT to hopefully reduce the number of credit card offers I receive. I will also call to discontine any catalogs I get in the mail if I have not ordered from that company in the last year.

5. I will better plan my garden and put more time into it this summer. My garden was completely disappointing this year, and I need to figure out why. Not only that, but I never seem to plant enough seeds either. Well, this year will be different! I am not saying I will master hi-tech gardenening like I saw recently at Epcot, but I will have a greater bounty, even if it means I have to go outside and sing folk songs to my plants and provide words of encouragement for them to grow.

That is about it for my 2012 goals for now. I will probably come up with some more meaningful goals in the next week, but maybe I won’t…

What are your plans for the new year?

Recently in Kentucky, there was a middle school boys basketball tournament.  Tournaments can be a great way to get a sports team ready for regular season play, and quite often, there can be lopsided games.

However, I don’t know if there has ever been as lopsided game as the one that occurred between Pikeville and Kimper middle schools, where the score was 100-2.

Yes, 100-2.

Can you imagine how long that game must have seemed?  Geez, I couldn’t even handle the last game of the Detroit Tigers-Texas Rangers playoff series this year when the Tigers got routed 15-5.  I would have lost my mind if my child was losing (or winning) 100-2.  Actually, Pikeville was winning 25-0 within the first 2 minutes of the game.  (At least the coach stopped full-court pressing at that point and removed all the starters.  Details of the game can be seen here.)

So now, Pikeville is at risk for having their season canceled as punishment for drubbing the opposing team.

Really, there is no easy answer for this situation.  However, I don’t think canceling the season is the proper response.  The people that will get hurt in that situation is the kids, and they totally don’t deserve that.  Sure, maybe they should have toned down their play, but they are kids.  It is up to the adults in this situation to do the right thing.

What Could the Pikeville Coach Do?

Really, the Pikeville coach’s hands were tied to a degree (although there is no excuse for having a full court press for more than 2 seconds in that game).  I have seen lopsided games before and there is no graceful way to handle it. If you pass the ball around like you are playing cat and mouse, that is insulting.  You could require opposite hand dribbling and shooting, but that might have still resulted in a similar score.  I don’t understand why there wasn’t a mercy rule like they have in high school.  (At least in Michigan during the regular season there is a mercy rule, I have no idea what happens in tournaments.)   I am not saying the coach shouldn’t be punished in some way, but I definitely don’t think these kids should  be denied a season of basketball.

Who Schedules A Game Like This In The First Place?

Fact is, this game never should have happened, period.  If a tournament does not have an ‘A’ and a ‘B’ bracket, then only similar caliber teams should be scheduled to play.  (Although Pikeville and Kimper are still supposed to meet up during regular season play anyway, which is pretty messed up in my opinion.)  The losing school, Kimper middle school, is very small and had no business playing one of the best middle school teams literally in the country.  I look at where my kids go to school and there is  a total of around 135 kids in the middle school. It would be insane to put them up against some of the bigger, more talented division 1 schools in the area, and our athletic director would never allow it.

Bottom Line:  There Is A Lot of Blame To Go Around

There are so many people at fault for this situation, least of which are the kids, who at this point will bear the brunt of the punishment if the season is canceled for them.  The Kimper coach never should have signed his team up for the tournament, the Pikeville coach should have had more class (I am sure a coach with his experience knew that he was going to be playing a team way beneath his team’s skill level), the ref should have stopped the game at a certain point, and the tournament director should have never allowed the two teams to play each other.  Now, there is a big mess about something that is supposed to be fun:  kids basketball.

What do you think?  Would you cancel the Pikeville basketball season?  Would you fire the coach?  Or, do you think life should just go on without any repercussions for anyone, and consider it a lesson learned?  Would you rather if your child was on the winning or losing team?

I don’t usually pay much attention to emails that circulate around the internet, like how there is a 98 percent chance that if you travel out of the country, you will wake up in your hotel room bathtub with your kidneys removed and instructions to call 9-1-1.

However, the following email arrived in my inbox yesterday that really struck a chord with me (I have no idea who the original author is):

Checking out at the store, the young cashier suggested to the older woman that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren’t good for the environment.

The woman apologized and explained, “We didn’t have this green thing back in my earlier days.”

The clerk responded, “That’s our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment for future generations.”

She was right — our generation didn’t have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled. But we didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

We walked up stairs, because we didn’t have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the grocery store and didn’t climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks. But she was right. We didn’t have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby’s diapers because we didn’t have the throw-away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts — wind and solar power really did dry our clothes back in our early days. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that young lady is right. We didn’t have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV, or radio, in the house — not a TV in every room. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana. In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn’t have electric machines to do everything for us. When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used wadded up old newspapers to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap. Back then, we didn’t fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn’t need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity. But she’s right. We didn’t have the green thing back then.

We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water. We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull. But we didn’t have the green thing back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus, and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service. We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn’t need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.

But isn’t it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn’t have the green thing back then?

What struck me about this post isn’t so much about the ‘green’ movement, but more about how life was so much simpler when even I was a kid in the 70s.  I totally remember using a push lawnmower with rotating blades.  (We did switch over to gas eventually.  I do like that those old-fashioned lawn mowers are coming back ‘in-style’).

I also can’t tell you how many miles I walked in a week.  I walked to and from school, to the store, to friend’s houses, everywhere.  I don’t think being driven around to sports and such was even invented yet!  It was either on foot or by bike, period.  (We were all much thinner too!)

There are a million ways that life was different when I was a kid than they are now.  I have to admit though, I miss a lot of the ‘old’ ways. And, whoever originally wrote this email was right- we probably didn’t consume nearly as much oil/gas/electricity back then.  However, it wasn’t because we were being ‘green’, it was more because technology hadn’t advanced far enough yet.

I wonder where we will be in 100 years?  Will obesity be the norm?  Will the ONLY sports being played be organized? (We are close to that now.)   Will babies be potty trained in-utero?  It is hard for me to envision what life will be like that far in the future considering how much things have changed in just 35 years.

What are you thoughts?  Did you ever use a push lawnmower?  Do you remember having only one TV in the house?